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Dealing with Toxic Friendships as a Christian Woman

Do you ever find yourself surrounded by people who drain your energy, bring negativity into your life, and hold you back from reaching your full potential? Toxic friendships can hinder our walk with God.

Toxic people can be detrimental to our well-being, but breaking free from them is easier said than done. 

Let’s explore practical strategies and biblical principles that can empower you, as a Christian woman.

Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.

1 Corinthians 15:33

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Recognizing Toxic Friends

One of the first steps is recognizing when we are in a toxic friendship.

It can be easy to overlook the signs or make excuses for the behavior of others, especially if we care about them or have known them for a long time. 

However, identifying toxic relationships is crucial for our own well-being and personal growth.

Here is a list of traits and signs commonly associated with toxic friendships:

  • Constant Criticism: A toxic friend often belittles you, criticizes your choices, and undermines your self-esteem.
  • One-Sided Relationship: The friendship feels lopsided, with one person consistently taking more than they give.
  • Manipulation: Toxic friends manipulate situations to their advantage, playing mind games and exploiting your vulnerabilities.
  • Jealousy and Envy: They’re envious of your achievements and try to downplay your successes instead of celebrating them.
  • Lack of Support: Instead of being there for you during difficult times, they might dismiss your problems or make them about themselves.
  • Gossip and Betrayal: Toxic friends might share your personal information without permission or gossip behind your back.
  • Constant Drama: They thrive on drama and seem to always be in the middle of conflicts, often dragging you into their chaos.
  • Emotional Drain: Being around them leaves you emotionally exhausted or drained due to their negativity.
  • Disrespect for Boundaries: They disregard your boundaries, whether it’s your time, personal space, or feelings.
  • Conditional Friendship: Their friendship seems to come with strings attached, and they’re only nice when it serves their interests.
  • Gaslighting: They manipulate your perception of reality, making you doubt your thoughts and feelings.
  • Isolation: Toxic friends might try to isolate you from other friends and loved ones, making you more dependent on them.
  • Competitive Attitude: They turn every situation into a competition, trying to outdo you in various aspects of life.
  • Unreliable: They’re consistently unreliable, breaking promises and not following through on commitments.
  • Constant Negativity: Toxic friends focus on the negative aspects of life and constantly bring down your mood.
  • Self-Centeredness: They’re primarily concerned with their needs and rarely show genuine interest in your concerns.
  • Lack of Empathy: They don’t show understanding or empathy towards your feelings and struggles.
  • Excessive Demands: They make unreasonable demands on your time, energy, and resources.
  • Frequent Disagreements: There’s a high level of conflict and arguing in the friendship, often over trivial matters.
  • Feeling Drained: After spending time with them, you feel emotionally and mentally exhausted rather than refreshed.

Sometimes toxic friendships can be subtle, so it’s essential to trust yourself and be honest with your feelings. 

Remember, your emotional well-being should never be compromised for the sake of a friendship.

Setting Boundaries for Your Well-being

Seldom set foot in your neighbor’s house too much of you, and they will hate you.

Proverbs 25:17

Once we have identified toxic relationships, it’s crucial to take action to protect our well-being and develop healthier friendships. 

This means setting boundaries that allow us to prioritize our mental and emotional health. 

Boundaries serve as a way to define what is acceptable and what is not, creating a safe space for ourselves where toxic people cannot enter.

Setting boundaries starts with understanding our own needs and values. 

Define your personal limits and identify the behaviors or situations that consistently leave you feeling drained or unhappy.  

By doing so, you are arming yourself with a clear understanding of what you will and will not tolerate.

Communicate Your Boundaries 

The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.

Proverbs 12:18

Letting toxic individuals know where you stand can help prevent misunderstandings and establish a healthier dynamic. 

Be assertive and direct in expressing your limits, making it clear that certain behaviors are not acceptable. 

Remember, your well-being should always come first, and it’s okay to prioritize yourself and your emotional health.

It’s important to note that setting boundaries may lead to difficult conversations or even the need to distance yourself from toxic people. 

This can be challenging, especially if you have a long history or emotional attachment to the person. However, staying true to your boundaries is essential for your own well-being. 

Create Distance in Toxic Friendships

Therefore, ‘Come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.’

2 Corinthians 6:17

If attempts to address the situation don’t have positive results, consider creating more distance between you and the toxic friend. 

This could involve gradually decreasing communication and avoiding situations where you’d interact.

Creating distance with a toxic friend can be difficult. It’s important that you listen to your instincts and make your well-being a priority. 

Don’t succumb to the guilt or pressure they might put on you to keep interacting with them.

If you feel the need to be more direct, you can explain why you want to take some distance and be honest about the situation. 

Whatever your choice, don’t forget that you have the right to limit communication with anyone who doesn’t add value to your life.

Seek Closure from a Toxic Friendship

In some cases, closure can be healing. If the friendship is beyond repair, you might decide to have a final conversation to express your feelings and intentions to part ways. 

It is hard to see an end to a toxic friendship, especially when we have put in so much effort, been so emotionally exposed and invested in the friendship.. 

It might mean ending the friendship permanently, or it might mean making an effort to find a way to transform the friendship into something healthier.

Regardless of the final outcome, It can help to heal our hearts and minds and allow us to move forward in our lives with a greater sense of peace.

Conclusion

Handling a toxic friendship requires courage, self-awareness, and a commitment to your own well-being. 

Remember that it’s okay to prioritize yourself and surround yourself with people who uplift and support you. 

I wear many hats; Wife, Mom, Minister, Blogger and Entrepreneur.

It’s not easy juggling everything but with the Grace of God, I can do all things!

My plate is full but my cup runneth over!!

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